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Crystal Evans Books

“The idea that sex is something a woman gives a man, and she loses something when she does that, which again for me is nonsense. I want us to raise girls differently where boys and girls start to see sexuality as something that they own, rather than something that a boy takes from a girl.”

— Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie



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Sunday, December 8, 2013

Am I a misanthrope or schizoid

“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe.”-Einstein

Closet Misanthrope or Schizoid 

Sometimes I will write stuff that doesn't make sense. I haven't been in my best emotional state of late. I am having a difficult time conceding the death of my relative. It is creating havoc on my happiness. 

These are My Opinions 

You don't bend the moral arc of this world by keeping your mouth shut. You will never write anything worthwhile if you don't create a cauldron of critics waiting to disparage your publications. 

I have never responded to criticism well because i often see a critique of my work as being a personal attack. I maybe somewhat right because in every criticism I received, my critics often hurl low blows at my character most of which is assumed instead of my work. 

I come to realize that's work is as much a part as some critics might think. Unlike them who are one dimensional, I have a light side, Dark Side and a Bad side. They probably spent their entire lives in disassociation trying to destroy the fiends that gnaw at the innermost recesses of their minds. I don't. I am what I am. 

I am slowly becoming a misanthrope. I am in despair because I have lost all confidence in humanity. I only see people, I haven't seen a human being for some years now. 

Maybe I don't really dislike people, probably I simply hate society or culture but then who creates cultural components and societal elements. People. I got to be true to myself. I am becoming a misanthrope. 

People like to pretend that they don't secretly hate each other. It rears its ugly head in envy and jealousy. Why do people cut people off that they can't control? People only love each other for themselves. They just won't admit it. 

People say I am morbid because I see dead people every week. They too are apart of what is really wrong with this world. You don't know my situation, don't judge me until you have a lived your life one day in my shoes. Until then keep stepping. 

You know last night a friend of mine said something to me that resonates until now, she said the problems people have with what you write is not so much because they think that you are doing something wrong but more with the fact that they do not see these golden ideas coming from your lips. It's just badmind and prejudice. If someone else had said what you wrote then they would be lining up to give it likes and commendation. 

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