“The idea that sex is something a woman gives a man, and she loses something when she does that, which again for me is nonsense. I want us to raise girls differently where boys and girls start to see sexuality as something that they own, rather than something that a boy takes from a girl.”
— Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Are Jamaican Men Hypocrites
I sat down on my verandah watching my baby sister play on the ground and wonder what the dating scene would be like for her in more than a decade from now. I pray that Jamaican men would change their hypocritical and double standard principles regarding relationships. Here are five instances of Jamaican male relational double standard and hypocrisy!
1. Have you ever listened to a hardcore sexual gratifying Jamaican song and noted that male deejays enjoy the idea of a woman granting oral sex but treats male conferring of the same said activity with disdain and repulsion? Jamaican men enjoy oral sex but do not want to give it back for fear that it will emasculate them. Even thought this maybe so, many men would prefer woman engaging in the ac but do not want to reciprocate the female.
2. Some Jamaican fathers enjoy having sexual relations with younger girls even the peers of their daughters but do not want to see other older men with their child. Jamaican men will have relations with a seventeen year old but do not want to see his seventeen year old in a relationship.
3. Jamaican men enjoy the idea of a woman on the street wearing revealing clothing but not the woman in his house. In some cases the man may have met the woman wearing revealing clothes on the street but now that she is his woman, she is not allowed to dress like that anymore. Additionally, when he goes out on the street, he is attracted to women in that attire.
4. Jamaican men contend that they want a woman with natural beauty and find the synthetic extensions and make up, superfluous and unattractive. Yet if a woman decides to be natural, she is less likely to attract the attention of a man on the street. I have walked down town with my natural unprocessed hair, unmade face and wearing Christian like clothing and not one male approached me. The next day I did my hair and dolled my face and went down town and it was an entirely different reaction from the men. Why Jamaican men claim that they want natural girl but a woman with natural looks especially a woman of Negro descent will not get any form of masculine attention on the road or in the dancehall.
5. Jamaican men will meet a girl in the dancehall and refused to allow her to go back to the party scene. Yet that is the very scene that he met her on. Just like the guys who pick women up from bars and marry her and then expect her to remain at home and never visit a bar again.