“The idea that sex is something a woman gives a man, and she loses something when she does that, which again for me is nonsense. I want us to raise girls differently where boys and girls start to see sexuality as something that they own, rather than something that a boy takes from a girl.”
— Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
Monday, January 4, 2010
Ten foolish rhetoric Jamaican Men use to get women into Bed
Welcome to my opinions on Jamaican men. I like to write a pervasive theorem on men in general but today I am going to focus on those in my own backyard. I am being frank when I say that few Jamaican men know how to approach a woman furthermore strike up an intriguing, substantial conversation void of daggering sex and expletives. Many Jamaican men have rules and regulations that a woman has to follow if she does not want to incur “bun” (infidelity). I say Kudos to the Jamaican men who are great conversationalist and from time to time allow women to use their wit instead of their sexuality. Additionally there are very weak and inane lines that many Jamaican men use to get woman to sleep with them and do their biddings.
Here are nine stupidest things Jamaican men say and women fall for it.
It won’t hurt, I promise
Hell no! Many women can remember accounts from older women and more experience peers on the deflowering process. Additionally many times when people tell you an experience will not hurt you: it is generally because they know that an ounce of risk and pain is involved. If a Jamaican man tells you it won’t hurt, do not believe him because you will be running for your panties.
Do it for me
Ladies I am going to be honest, I dated a man once who tried this one on me. He assumed that because I was an unassuming country girl dating the elite guy from the city that I would fall for that mantra. This is the lamest tune a Jamaican man can belt out to encourage a woman to engage in intercourse or one of its variants. And to be honest, many women have fallen for this tune and have done it for him only to discover that you are not that special after all. The special was meant for him: not for you.
You are the first girl
Any woman who has ever dated a Jamaican man has heard an aphorism about ‘she being the first woman he has ever done, love or say something to’. Do not believe a man when he says that. There are exceptions to the rule, where you are definitely a novel experience for him. But be careful, he may simply be playing the special card on you to get his novel yet familiar experience. Additionally, you may be the first girl to fall for that lame line after all.
The withdrawal method
The majority of pregnancies in Jamaica are unwanted pregnancies due to the popular yet unreliable withdrawal method of contraception. If you are going to have sex with a man and he refuses to use a condom then you should pack your things and leave. Some men will lie and tell you that they are withdrawing before ejaculation and spill the juices. Nine months later you have someone, who will remind you of your mistake. Do not be gullible and naive.
He lost his phone and that’s why he couldn’t call
Please! If a Jamaican man is very interested in a woman and he lost his phone. He will find other means of communicating with you. What about his friends and family? Why can’t he borrow their phones? Why doesn’t he make a collect call then? He is lying between his teeth. He just does not want to call or forgot to call. He is lying because he does not want to tell you the truth for fear of confrontation and criticism. Personally if he is unable to take responsibility for something as simple as a phone call imagine what will happen if you tell him that he did not use a condom and you are pregnant.
“I will do It tomorrow”
This is another maxim that Jamaican men make with the most sincere rhetoric but lack of any intention of following through. If a man says he is going to do something or give you something and he keeps procrastinating: chances are he does not want to do it and in many cases will not do it. He will continue to prorogue until you get the hint and relieve him of the duty. If a man keeps deferring a promise or a task, he is less likely to complete the task or comply with your requests.
“I will not go all the way”
Do you believe it when a man tells you that he will not go all the way that he means it? Most males do not have the will power to stop midway. And what’s the difference? Whether it’s halfway or all the way, it is still intercourse with its implications and possibilities. If you do not feel comfortable, do not have intercourse.
“Do it if you love me”
I do not care what a person does in his bedroom. That is his and his partner’s business. But I will not allow any man to bait me to do something that I will be ashamed of or I think it is opprobrium. A man who genuinely loves a woman will not force her to do something that contradicts her beliefs and makes her feel uncomfortable. Fundamentally, the experience is not about pleasing both of you; it is about satisfying his fetish and desires.
“You must do this if you want to keep me”
Ok! Doing it is not sufficient! If you want him to stick around, you will have to fulfill these desires. His highness has some criteria that you have to meet. This is a definitely symptom of an emotionally unavailable man. He may be emotionally unavailable for you and he is giving you monumental tasks to perform in order to receive his love. A woman should do something for a man because she wants to and not as a condition for fidelity and exclusivity. He is using you. It does not matter what you do; you will never be able to please him. It is a form of control and stringing you along simply to inflate his ego (boasting to friends that he is taking you for a fool). Do not allow someone to manipulate you with ultimatums and relationship chores. Get a real man today.
Do you know any other stupid things men say to women to get their way?