“The idea that sex is something a woman gives a man, and she loses something when she does that, which again for me is nonsense. I want us to raise girls differently where boys and girls start to see sexuality as something that they own, rather than something that a boy takes from a girl.”
— Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Ten attitudes that will turn a Jamaican Off
We know that there are various conducts, deeds, gestures and even utterances that are surefire ways to end a relationship and prevent the establishment of one. Jamaican men like most men also have their version of gestures, actions and verbalism that are completely off limits if you want to have a relationship with them.
Here are ten ways to turn a Jamaican Man off!
1. Call his phone incessantly
Men are not like women in that they do not have the centripetal level of emotions that we require. Whenever we meet a man we want to always talk to him because we interpret communication as a means of measuring the level of interaction and friendship that a man wants. However men may interpret frequent calling as a sign of insecurity and neediness. Eligible bachelors do not find women that are unsure of themselves attractive. Numerous calls may also indicate that you have a lot of time to waste and there are certain men that will not find that fact intriguing. Additionally, men like to chase women. Allow him to make the calls and chase you. You do not want to give him the idea that you are easy, ‘fryten fee him” or insane. Calling a guy often especially when intimacy has not been established may imply psychological disorders such as chronic obsession. A man will not feel comfortable knowing that you need to know his whereabouts every minute of the day.
2. Disrespect him while in public
Jamaican men and men overall are very keen on social perception by their male counterparts. A man will not take it lightly if you raise your voice at him in public as you would a child or pick a fight with him in front of his friends especially due to frivolity. A man may be forced to slap you to salvage his masculine ego and we do not want it to reach that far. Men are anthropologically, theologically and sociological the authority in the household. This means that he should be respected by his spouse. A woman dictating, quarrelling and reprimanding him in public sternly discord with those societal notions. That is a surefire way to insult a man, crush his ego and damage or reduce his love and appreciation of you.
3. Ask him to buy a phone card the first time you meet him
I do not know what it is with Jamaican men and phone calling cards but recently if you ask a Jamaican man to buy you a phone card, it will be equivalent to saying that you are a gold digger. Men associate phone card with phone calls. If a man buys you a phone card and do not get a call from you, then he assumes that you are just after the calling card and have no real interest in him.
4. Kiss and Tell
Jamaican men despise a woman that has sex with him and then tells her friends. This is further exacerbated if the man is sexually unsatisfactory or he has insecurities regarding his size. No doubt other men will engage you to hear about his ineptitude but they will also be wary of you for being a chatter box!
5. Disrespect his Mother
It is repulsive to disrespect his mother and family in any essence. The backlash and the damage to your relationship could be irreversible. His mother will always resent you for your obscene tongue and you will always been seen in the family as the girl who disrespected the matriarch. If he is a serious man then the minute that you make such foul utterances, you will be out the door.
6. When a woman is ‘too stush or too masculine’
A Jamaican man does not like a woman who behaves like a man. If he is an effeminate man then he will not be affected by a ‘mannish woman’. But most Jamaican men do not want a woman that behaves like a man. That is a surefire way to turn off a Jamaican man. Tom boys are absolutely off limit and on the other end of the spectrum so is the uppity, pompous and conceited. A woman who is arrogance will be perceived as desired conquest than as a potential partner.
7. A woman without ambition
A Jamaican man will be turned off by a woman does not possess any form of desire for success or purpose for the future. Jamaican men are not fond of a lady without a purpose. Additionally most men are seeking a partner to share the financial burdens of today’s modern family. Due to the devaluation of the Jamaican dollar and high cost of living due to inflation most males are seeking a woman that can bring ‘something to the table. Therefore both partners can share the cost and there will be more money in the household.
If you want a Jamaican man to dump you in a second, tell him that you cheated on him or that you have cheated on your last boyfriends. He will gladly assume that you are a cheater and that it is your relational trademark. Lack of trust in any relationship decreases its durability by fifty percent. A man will not trust a woman who is communally known as a serial cheater.
9. Give him a Jacket
Jacket is the Jamaican vernacular for a child who has a father that is not his biological father in the most cases, neither the child nor the father knows that they are not biologically related. The mother is the person who knows of this phenomenon. When a Jamaican man discovers that the woman that he lives with has given him another man’s child to father, it can greatly destroy the relationship. The man may decide to no longer support the child and may leave the relationship if the community is privy to the ‘Jacket Scenario’. A Jamaican man will think that you are taking him for an idiot by giving him a child that does not belong to him.
10. Search his phone
A Jamaican man’s phone is like his diary. If you want to have a huge argument with your spouse, take his phone and gloss through his messages. Call back every female number that you see in his phone and ‘trace them off’. You will certainly turn him off by doing that. He will be very angry with you and if you try that stupid stunt several times, you may well kiss your mate good bye!
Jamaican men do not tolerate invasions of their privacy. Men do not like women who search their gadgets or even private quarters. It communicates to him that you are insecure and possible emotionally unstable. A man will not want a relationship with a woman who does not understand or respects his personal space. He will not want a relationship with a woman who will be upset with his friends or mistrust his judgment.
For more insight on Jamaican Men click the following links