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“The idea that sex is something a woman gives a man, and she loses something when she does that, which again for me is nonsense. I want us to raise girls differently where boys and girls start to see sexuality as something that they own, rather than something that a boy takes from a girl.”

— Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

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Thursday, March 21, 2013

why-jamaicans-men-do-not-date-anymore?

Some men purported that there are women who will misinterpret his "taking Slow" as a sign that he was weak or an imbecile. They claim that women no longer appreciate the good things or rather men in life! Women use good men and chase bad boys! The average Jamaican begins a relationship often by meeting an individual on the street and they make arrangements for an assignation at later date often at the males house at his whim. I often say to my girlfriends “don’t you people date anymore?”. For most Jamaican man, the idea of a date is standing on the street, underneath a piazza or on the street corner trying to convince a female to sleep with them. Most women are mesmerised when they meet a man who wants to take her to dinner and spend some time getting to know her first before hitting the sacks! However this is often not so as is evident by the time span that most women take to get pregnant after they begin seeing a man. Relationships jump from one to five, skipping phases two,three and four. Men claim that they are “gangstas and that they don’t have time to date women since that will take up too much time and a lot of their meagre salaries. They prefer a straight kill and Knowing that they will barter their money for sex. They do not have any time to wine and dine a woman. Who should be blamed for this? Is it the women whose feminine values have dwindled to nothing, who readily accommodate the mediocre relational output that men bequeath simply because they are desperate and need the money to fulfill economical needs? An Upper middle class friend of mine once said that women were either tricks or strumpets. Is this a universal view of women? Why men think that it is dilatory and futile to extend traditional romantic gestures, accommodations and efforts on modern women since many cannot appreciate such notions. Do they think women are unworthy of being treated well simpy because we spend so much time trying to scheme, plot and trick men into remaining with us? Have women destroyed their own integrity and values therefore men no longer indulge us? Most Jamaican Males concept of dating is quite nonexistent. They simply want to meet a woman, take her to KFC and take her home to spend time which translation in male idiom means “have sex”. Some men think the idea of walking hand in hand on the beach is unmanly and “non gangsta-like”. Many men think that men who take time out to court a woman are idiots and that women will use them if they invest time, effort and elegance in a relationship before intercourse. Some Jamaican men claim that the reason why they don’t treat women well in the dating phase is because they cannot afford it. They cannot afford to spend money taking a woman to an expensive gourmet restaurant or a hotel and even if they could they would only treat certain types of deserving women like that. They know about the ideal dating situations but their financial situations and circumstances do not permit it. Some men purported that there are women who will misinterpret his “taking Slow” as a sign that he is weak or is an imbecile. They claim that women no longer appreciate the good things or rather men in life! Women use good men and chase bad boys! what do you think? Read more: http://beyondjane.com/relationships/dating/why-jamaicans-men-do-not-date-anymore/#ixzz2OCUUyBiX