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“The idea that sex is something a woman gives a man, and she loses something when she does that, which again for me is nonsense. I want us to raise girls differently where boys and girls start to see sexuality as something that they own, rather than something that a boy takes from a girl.”

— Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

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Tuesday, September 30, 2014

What to do with that response text that comes a few days, weeks, or months later...


What to do with that response text that comes a few days, weeks, or months later...


I know many women have been in that situation where you sent someone a text message. You were feeling desperate because you have not heard from him in five days, or your last message was ignored or in a bout of frustration you blurted out your most passionate feelings only to have it mercilessly disregarded. You painstakingly pull through, often through days of depressed and turbulent emotions managed to get over the embarrassment and hurt only to have that person reply a few weeks later. He does not reply, He texting you to catch up for he has ran out of platinum Pu$$y and is feeling a little bored and so he draws for the girls he knows are still very much desperately in love with him. You should not be happy. You should be upset if not mortified. You are a fall back girl.


You Know what to do.

A part of you is glad that this person finally responded or you are still sore from the bruised ego you suffered by the time they took to acknowledge your feelings that you opt to give them a taste of their own medicine. The Vindictive stance might sound appealing but i never go the way of personal vendetta. Maturity is always the best avenue by expressing my feelings about being ignored and letting my ignorer know that i am not even remotely interested in someone who treats me like an afterthought. I am not trying to hurt his feelings, I am just being honest about where i am in my life. I have a simple rule. If you can go that much days without speaking to me and i did not die then i can survive without associating with you for the rest of my life. I am a big girl, i will live.

I cannot be nice and women who go the route of being nice and accommodating will regret it. The very thought of how i felt during the period of "Oblivion" is enough to deter me from being even remotely interested in this person. I do not ever want to feel like that again and so i avoid him like a plague.

I know if you are not the most civil person that you might be tempted to blow up and hurl insults aimed at hurting them the way they did you but that route only confirms your feelings. The way of passive recognition even an affable conversation will irk them the right way. You can say Hi and be courteous and concern at the end of the conversation. It is unfair but at times you cannot always treat people as they truly deserve. It is sometimes better to choose the high ground.


I once told a young man that i am a webmaster so i know your type. You are like my webservers, unsecure and full of holes but these young girls are too desperate to land a man like you thinking you are some gateway to financial security that they can never effectively exploit you. He was shocked and I explained to him, "that is where your so-call irresistibility comes from, you are seen as an opportunity for economic improvement. Take all your money away, the social gratification of your financial position coupled with that cocky attitude and warped sense of entitlement and see how many of these women would even be remotely interested in you.
But people do have a change of heart and the period after reintroduction often determines whether or not this person is worth a second chance.

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