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“The idea that sex is something a woman gives a man, and she loses something when she does that, which again for me is nonsense. I want us to raise girls differently where boys and girls start to see sexuality as something that they own, rather than something that a boy takes from a girl.”

— Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie



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Thursday, July 17, 2014

Women are the agents of social change!

From the Book " Children of the Jamaican Working Class" 
Copyright © Crystal Evans 

I was watching a local television report where an elderly lady living in a zinc house. When I say zinc, I mean the entire structure is made out of zinc.  The middle age lady claimed that she and her daughter lives in the house with several children. She has seven children and her daughter has two. She went on to show the news crew her father's house which was made out of Zinc and Tarpaulin. I shook my head. Several generations of poverty and no one is making an attempt to improve the situation. I kept wondering what happened to the daughter's baby daddies.  They are suppose to provide shelter for their children. 

I don't know about any woman but I refuse to allow some man to " cock me up" anywhere and impregnate me. I mean if you don't have any where to put the head on your neck, you should not be in a rush to shove the one between your legs into an orifice. 

I stand firm by my belief that having too many children is the main culprit for the social maladies we experience including criminality and poverty.  This is something I observed from childhood. 
Mother has five children for five different man. Every man comes and promises to enrich her life and take care of the children. He leaves as soon as she gets pregnant for fear of committing to the financial burden of providing for her and her offsprings. 

Her sons grow up with feelings of inadequacy because they cannot buy " clarkes" to wear go school and not one teenage girl would glance their way cause they are not wearing Hollister and Polo. By the time they are fifteen, they become embarrass of living in the small house with mother and the smaller siblings. As the new man in the house. The son develops a growing sense of responsibility to his mother and kinship. He attempts to alleviate his mother's financial problems by turning to crime. He might die leaving children fathered by him for his already poor mother to take care of. The cycle continues... 

Daughters sometimes make the same mistake as the mother. She is often blackmailed or forced into relationship with older men who knowing the financial plight of the family offers to help finance her education in exchange for sex. Mother may or may not be aware of the arrangement as well as she might be complicit with it. The girl gets pregnant and the man abandons the union because he did not want a child or any form of commitment.  The daughter brings one more mouth to feed in the already crammed dwelling. If she does not wise up then very soon some other man will promise her financial security the way they did her mother. She will end up having children, she too cannot take care of. The cycle will no doubt continue. This is a transgenerational cycle of poverty and it will not stop until someone puts a condom on. 

Women are the agents of social change. Control how many babies we have and we could change the world. We cannot deny the connection between having too many children and poverty.  We know that poverty leads to more crime. Contraception literally saves lives.

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