Note to Self: Crystal Evans

I saw Tyler Perry made a post on Facebook earlier regarding a note to himself when he was younger. I realized that I too have often looked back on my younger years and wished I had known half of what I did now. Truth is I would have spent more time reading instead of playing Jaxs, cricket, bat and run a bound, volleyball and netball. I would change so many things if I could live my life over. 

But then life is all about living and learning. I was born an empty vessel and if I had parents to teach me certain things and create a firm foundation I would not spend so much time trying to find myself. If only my family had sought some of the lofty ideals that they held for me then they would have given me a jump start on life. Truth be told they didn't know much so they could only afford to share with me what was already revealed to them. My dad recognized my passion for my books and he propelled me to seek educational advancement so that I could have a better future than he did. 

I have come to concede that committing to my academically task was not so much of a burden but because I was distracted by so many things happening in my life, I was unable to do my best.i turned out pretty well but people believe that I could have done better. I have come to realize that there might be some merit of truth in their perspective. 

At twenty five, I am committed to making the best of my latter years. I believe for the most part that god has a unique plan for my life and whatever happened in my past was shaping me for the future. God is sculpting me for something great. If Nelson Mandella can go from prison to presidency then there is hope for me. 

Note to myself 

What are my beliefs? What defines Crystal Evans?

Have perseverance as one who doth forever endure, thy shadows live and vanish, but that which is in thee shall live forever more;that which is in thee know, for it is of knowledge, not fleeting life, it is the man that was, that is, for whom the hour shall never strike!

The Voice of the Silence HP, Blavatsky

What constitutes Crystal Evans? Why am I here? Why am I different from most people I know! Why do I make discord with the societal instruments that existed long before I was conceived in my mother's womb.

Why do I interrogate the core beliefs of the society that I live in? Why do I challenge men to treat women better? Big Society to give the youths a chance or Criminals to realize how ,much their behavior is detrimental to the advancement of this noble race? The human race. 

Why am I purporting that one be intrepid in face of ignorantly driven animosity? How do you reason with someone with the psychology of a nine year old with underlying psycho social tendencies that has nothing to do with you?

How profoundly do I believe that my concepts will be internalized by a society that is more interested in instant gratification, bling culture and being ingrates to people with money? How do I convince them to begin to dig deeper than popular belief to embrace the truth of the universe. People tell me I have changed. Yes I have grown much into myself in five years of blogging. Finding my true purpose, day in and day out.
I read a book that claimed that the true meaning of life is growing into our full potentials as sentient beings.

What happens when I die? The laws of nature suggest that energy never dies, it just moves from one host to another. I read a book written by a Buddhist years ago that claims that death to the organized mind is but yet the next great adventure. Another book suggests that every life we live, we experience it on a different plane. If we make the most of this life then we are birthed into the next realm into a better life.
It does offer some comfort to know that death is not permanent unconsciousness infinitely.

I do believe we live on in our children and that is how we gain immortality. I do however subscribe to this philosophy being that we eat plants and animals, when we die, plants and animal feed on our decomposing corpse. Life within itself is one great cycle.
I envision that death must be like when I fall asleep and the night events past with me being ignorant of it. I also assume that dying must be like the fight I have with my eyes when I try to stave off sleep but it eventually beats me.

My body involuntarily does what it wants despite what my mind tells it to. That's the revelation, this world, its illusions, the unknown, all exist in my head..
Hence my belief in Karma....

I am no greater than any other human, just being true to myself...