People have relationships for different reasons

I get stories from women I meet everyday through mutual friends, online from my page. I use their experiences as muse for my stories.
A young lady from my BPO told me that her guy was cheating on her, she said she discovered that while she was at work, he had some teenager at home.
She told me last night that it’s not the cheating that bothers her so much than how she thought she was being a whole woman to him, why would he spend his days with this little gal.
I related a story from my own experience to her.
You see I fell completely out of love with a man when he chose another woman over me. (That for me is like a kryptonite, once you openly own someone else, it’s a wrap”)
I told her one day we (this ex and I) were talking and the guy told me, he knew what he was getting into, he knew how bar girls stay but him did control that one.
I told her I remembered that part of the conversation where he said “he controlled her”.
I told her just as how you are wondering what could he see in this adolescent over you, I wondered the same thing until he told me, “him did control so and so”
The next thing I thought.
“Him neva want control me”
“Me in all my glory and smarts and resourcefulness”
“Instead he sought to tear me down”
“He could not appreciate me”
“Or maybe I didn’t give him something to control”
“He had a good woman, opted to control bad gal”

I explained to her that maybe her guy sees something in the little girl he doesn’t see in you, people have relationship for different reason, some for sex, convenience, money, myriad of factors.

I also told her, one day I saw the man’s new woman in stocking and uniform.
I realized he didn’t accept her work life, he wanted something better and she opted to fit into that mold.

I think relationships are psychological warfares and a lot of people are suffering from post traumatic stress disorders.
We tie so much of our worth to the outcomes of our relationship.
It’s not just an internal battle. It’s external too, people judge you, attach labels to you based on how your personal life pans out.
So we see a failed relationship, even after you gave it your best as a sign of overall failure and make a transitioning situation, a life tragedy.